From The Bottom Of Her Broken Heart
by SquintandProud-x
Summary: ONE SHOT. 'That night she lay on her bed, snuggling her knees up into her chest, and cried her broken heart out. ' BUFFY'S POV ON HER AND ANGEL'S BREAK UP.


**SUMMERY: When Angel and Buffy broke up. Buffy's POV.**

That night she lay on her bed, snuggling her knees up into her chest, and cried her broken heart out. Because there is no person in the world who is made to handle every punch that is thrown at them. We aren't made that way. In fact, we're made to get mad, upset, sad, hurt, stumble and fall. We aren't supposed to handle everything. Although, she always felt like the weight of the world was on her shoulders. But, in many eyes including her own, she was just a teenager with a destiny thrusted upon her.

Although, what happened when it wasn't vampires or demons who killed her ? What if it was someone she loved ? When he finished her, saying that he didn't want to be with her, she had died a little bit inside. Maybe it was because he took over her heart, her body and her soul. Maybe because the best part of her was him. Yet here she lay on her bed, sobbing into her pillow, because of him. The man who had showed her that there was so much more to life, that everyone had a soul mate with their name on it. How that had changed. Now he made her afraid. Yes, afraid. He made her afraid to be happy, because whenever she got too happy then something bad would always happen. And it was sad, in a teary eyed way, that the man of her dreams could make her feel like that. Like she had to fight happiness because the pain of having her heart broken was too hard.

She used to be a strong girl. But alot has changed, alot had happened, and she dealt with so much more than any person should have to go through. And you know something ? She finally broke. Everything around her crashed, and she fell right with it. She was not that strong anymore. The girl who once wore a smile, not lay broken with a frown.

And she remembered another mans words, which brought some sense into their situation and made them stop fighting what they had ...

**"You're **_**not **_** friends. You'll never be friends. You'll be in love till it kills you both. You'll fight, and you'll shag, and you'll hate each other till it makes you quiver, but you'll never be friends. Love isn't brains, children, it's blood... blood screaming inside you to work its will."**

It all made sense. Her brain told her to let go, forget him and everything about him. It seemed logical. Although, her heart was a different matter. Her heart screamed at her to not let him go, hold onto the end and fight for their love. For a short amount of time, her head and heart battled. And, you know who won ? The heart. Yet now, in this heart breaking time, she wished that she had followed her head instead.

**"You still my girl ?"**

**"Always."**

What she loved the most was how he claimed her as his. How he made her feel that she was wanted, needed, cherished. But when he finished her, when he smashed her heart into thousands of little pieces, all of it drained away. She felt worthless, unloved and useless. Now she felt like she belonged to nothing. She wasn't _his _anymore.

That night she lay on her bed, snuggling her knees up into her chest, and cried her broken heart out. Mascara smudged, eyes itchy and read, whilst she clutched her heart. Her heart craved love so much, that it made foolish mistakes, mostly in order to fill the void, though unfortunately ended up broken. Once her heart was broken, she knew it would never really heal. Yeah, sure, she would get over the hard part, and move on, and even find love again. Although she knew whenever a certain smell, a certain song, a memory reminded her of him, then that once broken heart would begin to hurt just a little bit more. They are always some cracks that never heal, maybe hidden in a part of the heart where it may not show, but would be always there.

That night she lay on her bed, snuggling her knees up into her chest, and cried her broken heart out.

Congratulations, kid, you broke her.

**A little bit depressing - I'm sorry! And not usually something I write about - I am a HUGE Buffy/Angel shipper! Although, having been through some hard times, I decided to write about their relationship from a different angle. Well, I hoped you liked it! Please review! **


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